my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
the day after is always just damage control
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
