we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
