put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize