the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize