hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
