your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Randomize
