I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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