Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
