I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
