We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
