no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
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Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize