you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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