I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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