I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
