id be glad to
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Randomize
