Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
