did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
