and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Why is there bacon in the couch?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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