I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
This is my gift to your gina
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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