that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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