i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize