I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
