i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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