I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
