im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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