Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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