My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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