I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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