he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Randomize