She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
