I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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