no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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