Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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