So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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