dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
