is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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