two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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