You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
