dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
