You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
