i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
NoShamevember. You game?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
