Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
