Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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