Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  My bottle opener just broke off in the cork

  (248): View more from Michigan

  They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts

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  (248): My bottle opener just broke off in the cork (248): They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts http://tfl.nu/wcrk
  Replies (5) Good night (747) Bad night (1025)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  One girl and one boy is just not enough.

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  (361): One girl and one boy is just not enough. http://tfl.nu/qv4l
  Replies (8) Good night (1081) Bad night (500)
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  (310): View more from California

  My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra

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  (310): My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra http://tfl.nu/y9he
  Replies (62) Good night (9639) Bad night (1108)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.

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  (847): my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b. http://tfl.nu/5vrv
  Replies (6) Good night (996) Bad night (3781)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.

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  (319): went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there. http://tfl.nu/ufbv
  Replies (9) Good night (3577) Bad night (791)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?

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  (443): do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick? http://tfl.nu/6riv
  Replies (46) Good night (4081) Bad night (1262)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.

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  (517): I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair. http://tfl.nu/elj5
  Replies (17) Good night (1501) Bad night (4267)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...

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  (512): Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not... http://tfl.nu/1rqn
  Replies (36) Good night (871) Bad night (7123)
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  (716): View more from New York

  He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.

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  (716): He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies. http://tfl.nu/v70e
  Replies (8) Good night (4134) Bad night (961)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.

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  (423): no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet. http://tfl.nu/ph90
  Replies (10) Good night (2757) Bad night (1151)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.

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  (281): Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low. http://tfl.nu/mevg
  Replies (5) Good night (858) Bad night (1252)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?

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  (814): How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed? http://tfl.nu/yb44
  Replies (8) Good night (2627) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.

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  (252): At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys. http://tfl.nu/070i
  Replies (6) Good night (1254) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.

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  (206): Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats. http://tfl.nu/azi3
  Replies (12) Good night (404) Bad night (890)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?

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  (514): Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew? http://tfl.nu/9nvu
  Replies (2) Good night (299) Bad night (545)

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