You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
