That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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