just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize