I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I deserve this hangover.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
