Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize