Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
